How to form a good relationship with my sister?
Danielle asked:
My sister and I are completely different people. I consider myself to be more shy and quite while she is loud and in your face all the time. We are not close at all. However I am very close with my mom. If my mom wants to go out and asks us if I say I am going she refuses because she “hates it when I am around mom” If I am talking to my mom she comes in and asks if we are talking about her. I have told my mother stuff that I probably shouldn’t but they were for good reasons for example giving this kid our house key! Or just hanging around the wrong crowd. I want to be close to her but I just don’t know how
I was at work the other day and text her asking her if she wanted to go shopping. She said yes, and then an hour later she was like it is raining so maybe some other time. I was a little annoyed because it wasn’t like we were going to be shopping outside, but I let it go. Then I get home and she has her friend over. I was pissed. The next day we went and the whole time she just texted and complained and she expects me to pay for everything. And I don’t mine paying because she is still in high school and unemployed but she never offers even when she has money….I am a big planner like I am already planning my summer. So I go downstairs and I am like so this summer we can do this and that and go to the beach etc. She was like no I am too fat for the beach (She isn’t fat at all btw) So, I wanted to get in better shape myself so I asked her if she wanted to go on a diet with me and she says no I am too white to go to the beach. (But if her friend invited her she would go) You might think I am jealous of her picking her friends but that’s because I am. It annoys me when my friends and their sisters go out because I do not have that and I really try to. Has anyone else ever a had similar problems with a sibling? Did you ever become closer as time progressed?
Ruth
My sister and I are completely different people. I consider myself to be more shy and quite while she is loud and in your face all the time. We are not close at all. However I am very close with my mom. If my mom wants to go out and asks us if I say I am going she refuses because she “hates it when I am around mom” If I am talking to my mom she comes in and asks if we are talking about her. I have told my mother stuff that I probably shouldn’t but they were for good reasons for example giving this kid our house key! Or just hanging around the wrong crowd. I want to be close to her but I just don’t know how
I was at work the other day and text her asking her if she wanted to go shopping. She said yes, and then an hour later she was like it is raining so maybe some other time. I was a little annoyed because it wasn’t like we were going to be shopping outside, but I let it go. Then I get home and she has her friend over. I was pissed. The next day we went and the whole time she just texted and complained and she expects me to pay for everything. And I don’t mine paying because she is still in high school and unemployed but she never offers even when she has money….I am a big planner like I am already planning my summer. So I go downstairs and I am like so this summer we can do this and that and go to the beach etc. She was like no I am too fat for the beach (She isn’t fat at all btw) So, I wanted to get in better shape myself so I asked her if she wanted to go on a diet with me and she says no I am too white to go to the beach. (But if her friend invited her she would go) You might think I am jealous of her picking her friends but that’s because I am. It annoys me when my friends and their sisters go out because I do not have that and I really try to. Has anyone else ever a had similar problems with a sibling? Did you ever become closer as time progressed?
Ruth
blackrose1212
Bobby
You should be very honest with your sister and share how your feel jealous when you see other siblings that are able to get along, and hang out with each other. It’s not that you both have to have the very same things in common. That’s what makes each person their own person being who you are with varying likes and dislikes. But as siblings i’m sure there’s at least one or two common interest you share. As for telling your mom/parents what ever concerning your sister and her friends. Surely your sister knows your the one informing your parents. That could be a result of your jealousy and pay back because she hasn’t spent time with you. You can’t force your sister into hanging out with you and behave the way you want. Like i said she’s her own person and wants to select friends with common interest. Telling your sister you’d like for you both to hang out and why might cause some positive changes that will allow the bond to develop and grow between you two. I wish you the very best.
living star
Erik
Your sister needs you to step back and let her miss you.Stop trying to hard.She’s angry at you for being the one telling on her.She will get over it.So start mingling with your own friends and use the energy to your own life.Then when she sees your not trying she will come looking for you.Talk to her and tell her that you wanted to have a close sister relationship and that your sorry for being pushing but you will back off.Tell her that you envy all her friends with their little sisters and that’s what you wanted with her.Be stern and apologetic at the same time.That way you leave her feeling bad at the way she treated you.Even if you go to the mall by yourself pretend your going with your
friends.She will want to start being with you.So move on but don’t jump right away for her.Teach her a lesson on respecting her elders.